Time: where did you go? – A Student’s Dilemma

It’s the most wonderful time of the year. There’s a smell in the air and yes…that’s the odour of fear and desperation permeating from the library. The past week and a half and the forthcoming days have been perfectly coined by my friend writing exams in law school as “bored panic”. Never before have you been so stressed and suffering from such mind-numbing ennui at the same time. This is what we pay the big bucks for, kids.

I can’t believe exam week is upon us again! Didn’t we just do this not so long ago? As someone who takes a little longer to grasp some concepts, doing the same thing as last time means you can expect the same results (i.e. passing on a wing and prayer) or is the definition of insanity: the choice is yours. So if you, like me, enjoy procrastination, here are some helpful tips I have previously employed, am currently employing, and wondering how to fit in all the procrastination I have planned in the next few days!

1. Per the aforementioned smell of the library, I would say avoid it all costs. You’re much better off at home where study break dance parties are not only socially acceptable, but borderline part of the rental agreement.
2. Have an ineffective exhaust fan in your bathroom that is leading to black dots of mold in your bathroom? This is the best time to bleach the whole thing; I think the fumes might even encourage you to go back to work.
3. Money is tight these days, so maybe you can’t afford all the luxuries you used to, like paying someone to maintain your eyebrows. Spend time in front of the mirror (because you like to do it anyway) and carefully shape your own brows. Chances are high that you’re going to screw them up and need to pay to go get them fixed because you didn’t know how to do them yourself in the first place.
4. Visit the grocery store daily. Everyone needs to eat – multiple times an hour.
5. Bake! I have been baking up a storm since moving to this country. It’s soothing and delicious. Can’t say that about studying. This may be why point 4 is a point, but hey – correlation, not causation, right? #ProcrastinationKitchen
6. It’s getting chilly and even for a Canuck like me that means sweater weather. But as I’ve mentioned before, I certainly don’t trust the UK washer/dryer business with my precious woollen goods. Now is the best time to hand wash your sweaters and lay them out to dry. By the time you get back from holidays they should be only slightly damp.
7. Run. There’s nothing quite like physically running away from your adult responsibilities (of studying). I’ve run through almost all of the Royal Parks, and have definitely improved my pace, but still don’t understand options.
8. Have a senior moment. I don’t mean soil yourself in a public place, but perhaps your flatmate has brought new hardware for your TV and now you have six remotes and a keyboard to point at the TV. Nothing makes you feel smart quite like pressing all the buttons to watch what happens. At least at that point you feel better about cash flow from operations (or worse).
9. Go on a date. Back-to-back Saturday exams got you down? Take Saturday night off and re-join the land of the living, put on a kicky little outfit, charm someone and allow yourself to be charmed. I did statistically better on my Sunday exams and where n=1, statistics never lie.
10. Read this blog. Congratulations, you’ve procrastinated all the way to the end. Take solace in the fact that it took me longer to write it than it took you to read it.

Stay classy, we’re almost there. 

Image credit: Rami Banna

28 Days Later - Ten Things I [Love/]Hate About You

Get it? It’s a terrible Photoshop of a scene from 28 Days Later with my face in it – because I’m 28 days into term 1 at school and live in London. Damn it, I was right: Business School is murdering my creativity. Of course I was supposed to write this post 28 days into being here, but flip turning your entire life gets in the way sometimes, okay?

The following is a collection of what I’ve learned since I’ve moved here. Zero academic content ahead.
      
 On London

•  A lot of people consider b-school a two year vacation from life, and you aren’t wrong entirely. However, this two-year vacation comes with late night group meetings, countless spreadsheets, and sleeping less than six hours a night. And don’t get me wrong, it’s not a hard life; but I don’t spend my days in indie coffee shops and traverse art galleries. I have to do the things I did back home like buy toilet paper and scrub the sink. I don’t know why I am so fixated on the bathroom – because I am not calling them loos. The British would think that I was making fun of them, and they’d be correct. So sorry to disappoint, daily life in London is just like daily life anywhere else.
• I’ve discovered why people in the country are so surly here. It’s because clothes don’t dry here. Washer/Dryer combos should take a cue from 2-in-1 shampoo and conditioner, that shit just don’t work. It takes like four days to air dry a pair of jeans.
• The best learning I’ve had so far is to learn how the buses work. They look all menacing because they turn and go all over the place, not to mention you don’t really how the stops at each intersection work – but once you do learn, it’s worth it; since that means you don’t have to descend the depths of hell to take the Tube, and it smells way less on the bus (most of the time). Bonus, if you sit in the front seats of the second level it’s like a video game called “hit the pedestrians”.
• On the subject of the pedestrian-vehicular dynamic – I still can’t get over how pedestrians have zero right of way here.  No additional story on this, other than seriously, cars: you suck.         

On School

• When you arrive in this country with no highlighters and two hockey jerseys, you realize that you’re a much better Canadian than you are a student.
• Remember the days when your only two options you had were to pay attention or fall asleep in your seat? My university lecture halls didn’t have cell phone service, nor did anyone really bring their laptops to class when we all didn’t have MacBook Airs that weigh next to nothing. Mine was like 11 pounds (and I don’t mean quid). Now I can be on my phone, tablet, or laptop and never pay attention, nor can I sleep. Worst still is when you have to watch the people in the rows ahead of you online shop/watch videos.

On People

• Sometimes life is like an Alanis Morissette song where you meet the man of your dreams and then you meet his beautiful wife. If only he had mentioned her way earlier in our conversation.
• Know what’s important in friends - find the girl who understands why it was so important for me to bring my 5-inch Brian Atwoood shoe boots, hug her, and never let her go.

On Cultural Differences

• When you’re describing to someone what a hipster is, make sure you aren’t describing your own glasses and love of aggressively coloured pants. And then telling them that hipsters refuse to think of themselves as hipsters. Man, back in my advertising days I was the most buttoned up of the lot. It’s a sliding scale of hipster, like the sliding scale of douche. It’s all in what you’re used to. Don’t worry, I still don’t own a single plaid shirt; I changed countries, not brains (though maybe that would have helped).

On Self-awareness

• If you’re going to sink yourself into debt going back to school don’t spend the preceding few years developing ridiculous standards. Because those who climb the highest fall fastest when the paycheques stop. This is the lowest sheet thread count I’ve dealt with for a long time and I’m sincerely re-thinking all of my dry clean only goods.  But never forget who you are, because polyester will always be a poly-no-sir.

I can already tell that this is the best decision I’ve made in a long time. Even if I don’t really know what I’m doing half the time, life is carefully, carelessly spinning out of control. And I think I like it. I’m glad we’re not in Kansas anymore, Toto; because London is the shit.  

Home is where the heart is - An ode to joy

Don't be scared, I'm not Natalie Portman and I'm not giving birth to a baby in a Walmart. Additional points to anyone who understands that reference. I was just re-reading my last post from the end of 2012 where I was positing where I'd be in 6 months - and it's been a bit longer than that now, but I must have a fifth sense and be a little psychic. 

I do think it's amazing how different I am since I started this unemployment blog back in 2009. I was looking for a job after completion of my first post-graduation contract. Nothing like job searching in a recession to help one pass the time. Over time, this blog has taken some twists and turns and various hiatuses, but it's a little glimpse of who I've been for the past five or so years.

I have this folder of pictures on my hard drive called "The Next Chapter"; previously all my photos had been categorized by year in university or high school. But after school it was hard to delineate divisions of time periods that seemed pertinent, other than a chronological year (boring). And I feel now is an appropriate close to "The Next Chapter" and onto the next yet to be named part of the journey.

But I couldn't be who I am without all the people I've met, known, loved, hated (those are thankfully very few), and learned from in the past five years. And instead of talking about me, today I wanted to talk about somebody else for a change. This may be a bit sappy, but it's my departure and I'll sap if I want to. I want you to know how important you are to me; because if it's on the Internet, it can't be erased. 

It has been a privilege and an honour to be a tiny part of your world. Everything I am is because of the people I am so lucky to be around - striving to be better and being encouraged to always do the right thing. Thank you for being my entire world; I known what great joy is by being around you.

Whether we are lovers, haters or don't speak as much as we used to, you have influenced my life in the past five years and I could not ask for more.

You have brought me up and down, as the tides of friendship go. I hope you have learned as much from me as I have from you. Thank you for always reminding me that I'll never be (and don't need to be) perfect, and that you love me anyway. 

We have eaten, drank, sung, danced, laughed, and cried together. All of my favourite verbs. 

As I embark on a new journey across the pond, I know that home is where my heart is; and my heart is with you. I leave you with the words I keep chanting to myself in order to feel okay:

Be brave.


...Trust me, I'm a business major.